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papayasing loser with no goddamn interests no wonder no one wants to talk to you
Sunday, 23-Nov-14 02:58:24 UTC from web-
@yodelerty Wanting to talk to you and having something to talk about are two different parts of the venn diagram.
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@mastertdi well I never have anything to talk about anyway so it's not like anyone could so i'll probably die alone and boring and young like i DESERVE
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@yodelerty I cannot describe it dude. I /want/ to talk to you, you /want/ to talk to people, and, frankly. I am jealous of that. I love people. but, sometimes, I fear it is that I don't care. You. Do. Man. People here love knowing about you, but, it can be hard to talk to someone. We love you, and, it is why we bother with you my friend. WE love the dole out of you. For he sake, you have an interest, you want to talk to people.
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@yodelerty *hugs*
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@yodelerty You don't deserve to die though.
MetalTao likes this. -
@metaltao an interest in talking to people does not make one an interesting person to talk to especially when i'm introverted as papayas
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@mastertdi good one
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@yodelerty I wish I knew how to word this. Ugh.
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@yodelerty You want to though, be expressive of that. You are capable, so very capable of figuring out.Not knowing what to talk about doesn't mwan you can;t /find/ something to talk about. But, that is the prolem, you are not supposed to find it, it comes to you, from internal, it requires improv and, you have to do that by letting your mind wander freely mate. And, not let it lock up during conversation. You can learn things in your free time. But, even if that doesn't work, you can get away with carrying on a conversation by asking questions every time, they require a response. You feel me?
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@mastertdi i don't think there'd be a right way to word it because i'll still want to die
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@yodelerty Want to, sure. But you've done nothing to actually warrant death.
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@metaltao I know the basics of conversation making but there's a fine line between book knowledge and being able to apply it. Which I cannot do. And I know I can learn things in my free time but I'm such a worthless moron that I spend my free time doing nothing ever except crying and sleeping because i'm so goddamn applesed up
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@mastertdi being worthless and not even worthy of fixing myself pretty much sums it up
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@yodelerty If I said all that about myself, as I so often do, would you say I deserve to die?
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@mastertdi of course not but you're way more worthy than my of life
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@yodelerty *me
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@yodelerty kiwi i swear i had a good point dole papayas
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@yodelerty That is not a fault of your own, that, is more along the lines of being lazy unconsciously out of a glitch. More specifically, the unconscious.Motivation happens unconsciously usually, but it can be moved to the conscious if it is not working properly. One can, make themselves do something by willing it, and, it doesn't require learning, for it is a highly internal learning. You can just think of dwanting to do something, and, you can then make your self do it. Granted it adds a step to the motivation process, but it will make you do things.
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@mastertdi sorry man
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@yodelerty me too
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@metaltao I can't make myself do stuff if there's nothing specifically I want to do. There's the problem.
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@yodelerty That is the whole point, you fore your self, and eventually you won't have to. You will love it through intimacy
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@metaltao *and not inherent-acy.
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@metaltao not if i die in the next little while
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@yodelerty You will know and figure out waht to talk about! Your experience is one that will help others, do not see it as nothing, beat this bullbananas feelings and murdock on its grave by using what you went through to raise others by helping them understand. The thing about life, everyone goes through downs. Some more than others. And, some will want to just keep it down. You can not only be a freaking amazing guy to talk to, but you are a hero. Do not end your journey early, struggle on my friend, do not go quietly into that goodnight!
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@metaltao >implying i could ever even be close to amazing at anything
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@yodelerty That is the thing, you do not have to be amazing to the world, just a few people. Change their lifes, and you can change the parts of the world
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@metaltao I'm amazing to no one
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@yodelerty Narwhal would probably say otherwise. And, you have a suppressed desire to express and be accepted by others, that is beautiful and /very/ poetic. Like some kind of flower eh?
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@metaltao not really
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@yodelerty It is not the self that solely determines their own worth, that would be vain. It is others who play the largest part in it. hey see what the self cannot.
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@metaltao Yeah but there's no reason for them to think anything nice about me
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@yodelerty That is not for you to decide, they will decide if they want to find something nice about. Stop hurting your self. Ones worth is not always obvious. It took me 12 years to figure that out.
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@metaltao meh
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@yodelerty Alright, I am just saying my friend, that I want you to realize, you have worth. If you really were committed to the supposed idea having no worth, than why would you be fighting it?
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@metaltao Because otherwise I'd just kill myself and apparently people don't want that to happen?
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@yodelerty No, more like, the mind is not cemented, and the body is not. Unlike the mind, (even though it is amazingly useful) the body can't be fooled by mere emotions or, large mysteries. It knows what it needs to do. And, the only thing stopping you is your mind. Sadness, is weird like that. You will be missed. Besides, this is not the most fun conversation to be held among two individuals eh>?
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@metaltao This similar conversation can be had without the threat of self harm. it can be all theoretical or hypothetical.
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@metaltao This ain't that fun. I want to die still.
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@yodelerty That is because, this isn't the most fun of conversations, there are more to be held and then treasured. Aye? You understand that. Don't you? More times to be interesting and entertain others because you want to be noticed? End it on a high note as they say.
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@metaltao No conversation I have will ever be fun because there's nothing for me to talk about. Nothing can be treasured.
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@yodelerty You are saying you /haven't/ had something to talk about The proof is in the past AND present. You have talked to people. And are. You are just not taking the lessons from this conversation to others. This is one of the most fluid conversations O have had. Probably from time, but you have not used time for knowing what to talk about to others. You can think head for what you should say or want to say to others. You are just fogged. You are being to focused on the bad, and valuing the bad more than the good so much so, you are overshadowing them with your loathing. Do you feel as if everything is useless? Like, Life is useless? It may or may not be, it is up to you to decide, and change that.
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@metaltao Only I am useless. Everyone else is fine.
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@yodelerty That is insanely improbable. You are FULLY capable, you have a working mind, a FULL mind. Some are born with out it. Some are even born with out limbs or even emotions. Yet, they have /learned/ to feel or make do because, Humanity is not static. It is flexible, and you are no exception.
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@yodelerty And, even if you are useless, let others help you live through your life, and bring joy to it.
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@yodelerty If you are the /only/ "useless" person out there, then the world should be able to help. And, it is.
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@metaltao no one should have to help me though. And I'm glad people who were born much worse off than me have become much better than me.
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@yodelerty And, you are not broken in the mind? You are not just, needing to make your self capable, you have just brushed off Dissonance and wisdom by distancing your self from others? Are you wanting to be ok? I know someone who wants you to live. She finds it sad.
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@metaltao who's she and why does she care
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@yodelerty I... Never mind, look, mate, this person. I am basically carrying out her will. In a way. Ok?
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@metaltao what
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@yodelerty Just, never mind. Ok? You are worth it.
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@metaltao I shouldn't have said anything.
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@metaltao not even close but thank you
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@yodelerty What happened to you?
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@metaltao eh?
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@yodelerty Huh? What?
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@metaltao What do you mean? What happened to me? I don't understand.
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@yodelerty I didn't say anything. I just got, confused. Ok?
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@metaltao Uh.. okay, man.
MetalTao likes this. -
@yodelerty Alright, so, hows your day?
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@metaltao 100% horrible.
MetalTao likes this. -
@yodelerty Damn, that is some pure horrible there. How did that happen?
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@yodelerty MANNERISMS!
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@metaltao I remembered that I've done nothing with my life and I can't make friend in real life because I'm awful. And I'm the laziest person on the planet. And I feel inadequate to everyone. And there's nothing good about me so I should be dead. Yup. Pretty much my own fault.
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@yodelerty There's something good about you. You don't go around murdering people. :D
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@scorchentine I'd be bad at that.
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@yodelerty XD Sounds like my fault mate. But, hey, quit being insane man! Your day. sounds bad. Need some help with it?
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@yodelerty How was it bad?
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@metaltao My day will not get better and it's not your fault. I'm just the worst person alive.
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@yodelerty HAH! Worst person! Mate, you are clearly not the worst person alive if you believe you are the worst person alive.
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@metaltao implying
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@yodelerty What am I implying? Was I not implicit?
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@metaltao I'm always the worst person and I have full confidence that I'm right
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@yodelerty Bwahahah! You know, there are many people who are as bad ass you and WANT to be this way by spreading it willingly. You clearly do not want to do this. Being the worst. Socrates would be rolling in his grave!
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@metaltao good, he should keep rolling because I'm right as papayas
MetalTao likes this. -
@yodelerty Then I guess you are! Hurray for you! Now, what do you want to do? You want to leave the title or hold it? Make the worst person even decent? LET'S OD THIS YEAHHHHHHHHH!
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@yodelerty Look, Bor, I have met WORSE people than you. Peope who are hated y all.
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