{"version":"1.0","provider_name":"Rainbow Dash Network","provider_url":"http:\/\/rainbowdash.net\/","type":"link","title":"Gherkin \u2611\ufe0f (thelastgherkin)'s status on Friday, 20-May-11 15:55:49 UTC","author_name":"Gherkin \u2611\ufe0f (thelastgherkin)","author_url":"http:\/\/rainbowdash.net\/thelastgherkin","url":"http:\/\/rainbowdash.net\/notice\/110947","html":"Dear Mr Cheese.  It has come to my attention that, despite your vast selection of arcade machines onsite, your business plan has two major flaws: the first, that your pizza is bad, and the second that you have no branches in the UK.  I hereby take it upon myself to expand your franchise to these shores, opening outlets on the former sites of our own amusements lost in the economic downfall.  Our pizzas will be made with only the finest ingredients to ensure maximum flavour, and your rodent mascot will likely be rebranded as Charles Edgar Cheese.  I hope you take my ideas into consideration.  Yours sincerely, Jack.  PS. do note that I am seeking first time employment."}