{"version":"1.0","provider_name":"Rainbow Dash Network","provider_url":"http:\/\/rainbowdash.net\/","type":"link","title":"Cerulean Lulamoon-Spark (ceruleansparkold)'s status on Monday, 23-Apr-12 11:57:33 UTC","author_name":"Cerulean Lulamoon-Spark (ceruleansparkold)","author_url":"http:\/\/rainbowdash.net\/ceruleansparkold","url":"http:\/\/rainbowdash.net\/notice\/1264234","html":"I feel like I'm kind of falling apart. I don't know if I'm burned out or what. I "finished" my therapy course but I don't really feel like it made any difference. Meditation doesn't help as much as it used to, and I feel like my medication doesn't work properly anymore either. I feel almost compelled to take more than I should do, and I carry the box around with me habitually because I don't feel safe without it. I feel pretty fixated on suicide too. I don't know that I'd actually do it, but thinking about it is some kind of perverse comfort to me."}