{"version":"1.0","provider_name":"Rainbow Dash Network","provider_url":"http:\/\/rainbowdash.net\/","type":"link","title":"dezzie again (dezzierose)'s status on Monday, 30-Apr-12 03:06:40 UTC","author_name":"dezzie again (dezzierose)","author_url":"http:\/\/rainbowdash.net\/dezzierose","url":"http:\/\/rainbowdash.net\/notice\/1303433","html":"Keith has suffered from third degree burns over 95% of his body twice, lost two fingers and a toe to frostbite, broke both of his legs after driving his car off a cliff, built a shack out of mud, got stabbed by a Homeless man, got tear gassed by the police, snuck a paintball gun on a roller coaster, got attacked by an alligator, bombed by the military, drowned in the Tunnel of Love, got cut up by his own "bumper-car" lawn mower leaving him with wounds over 90% of his body, got cement paved over him in a sewer after falling down an open manhole, lived in a graveyard for a year after getting kicked out of his house, fell off a roller coaster onto the tracks with the ride still going, got a tattoo on his forehead saying "I'm a moron" for $200, ate three pounds of raw chicken, turned a recreation of colonial times into a raccoon fight in his backyard, drove across a river without using the bridge, married a couple, and would've gotten married himself, if he hadn't run from his own wedding."}