{"version":"1.0","provider_name":"Rainbow Dash Network","provider_url":"http:\/\/rainbowdash.net\/","type":"link","title":"A Big Pony (bigpony)'s status on Tuesday, 07-Aug-12 17:13:58 UTC","author_name":"A Big Pony (bigpony)","author_url":"http:\/\/rainbowdash.net\/bigpony","url":"http:\/\/rainbowdash.net\/notice\/1788271","html":"@nerthos<\/span><\/a><\/span> opens on @scribus in a crap cadilac. He's the only one on the new freeway as it hasn't officially been opened yet. He eventually gets pulled off the thing by a giant magnet and as soon as he's off, they open it officially. Him and a bunch of street racers battle it out for who gets on the freeway first (spoilers:he loses) and the car transforms into a mercedes. Once on though, he spins around and drives backwards. After a minute, he spins back around and ends up hitting a tollboth continuously as sad music plays. His right door falls off and he falls out before he can drive away revealing that he was DJ Pauly D the whole time. The tollboth guy then hesitantly steals the now trashy car and does a 180, screaming in slow motion as the body gets run over by thousands of cars. Ending: cut to news broadcaster saying "a lot of gangsters died in the incident as well, but no one cares about them.""}