The white void (hakupony)'s status on Sunday, 13-May-12 00:17:07 UTC
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@pegasisterforever You got me with chapter two. I thought it was just really bad writing but it was just a dream. But seriously, dreams tend to be strange but this one had very little to do with what really is in the show. Fluttershys best friend who we never seen before (since Fluttershy is the kind of Pony who makes so many friends) - a younger brother of Pinky Pie we never met before even though she would introduce everypoy to him if she had one and Princess Celestria graduating school and Fluttershy must be reminded to take care of the animals. Not to the part outside of the dream: why would I care for those people? If you don't start building up some tension, I'd not read further. It really pains me to be so rude but even though you do have a decent writing style, I just can't start caring for your story. The only thing I really would want to know after two chapters is why dreamworld-ponyville was destroyed.