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Going to sleep sad sucks. Maybe I should be thankful for my headache If it gets worse and drowns out all the sad
Friday, 11-Jan-13 06:25:01 UTC from StatusNet iPhone-
@yolodelerty on the plus, I've been successfully pushing myself to do things with more danger, so that I can put myself on the edge and quit being clumsy
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@renovatedkitchen Putting yourself in the !dangerzone
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@yolodelerty @renovatedkitchen I haven't said hi to you two yet! :o #HUUUUUUGS
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@yolodelerty yup. Anything from running up stairs and not looking at them to standing on the edge of a high ledge and reaching over. Keeps me on edge, brain at ready to quickly decide what to do if I fall and if I do fall, a painful lesson on what to avoid. Gotta go !dangerzone
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@dlcentaur hello
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@renovatedkitchen I cut my thumb on scissors today. It bled profusely.
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@yolodelerty @renovatedkitchen I've missed talking with you guys. :c
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@dlcentaur Yeah, man. :( Been busy?
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@yolodelerty Very, what with website Administration, School, Work, etc.
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@yolodelerty cutting yourself always sucks. Takes a while to heal
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@dlcentaur likewise
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@renovatedkitchen #Hugs Is everything going alright, bro?
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@dlcentaur yeah. So far yes
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@dlcentaur You're a trooper, my friend. I hope for good things in your future.
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@renovatedkitchen Super good to hear! Have things been better or worse, in general?
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@yolodelerty Thank you so much! c: I hope the same for you, man. But you know, life is a challenge to be met. ^3^
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@dlcentaur depends on since when. I'm applying for school soon and then going to apply for the Air Force. If I get in I'm good. If not then I get to take the spiral downwards
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@dlcentaur And I'm hoping we can face the challenge and perform admirably.
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@yolodelerty I'm sure you'll do great! xB
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@dlcentaur And you, as well! :D
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@renovatedkitchen Just remember, bro. There is always another path! Don't think that just because one door gets shut in your face that there isn't another door open somewhere out there. But, still, I think you'll get in.
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@yolodelerty ^-^ Now, would you mind reminding me what you'll be getting into?
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@dlcentaur I'm in university for software engineering.
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@dlcentaur I know. But if I don't get in, I get to do MDMA and the things I enjoyed because I will no longer require to be clean
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@yolodelerty Sweet! Do you have any companies, businesses, or programs in particular you're interested in?
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@renovatedkitchen You can fight it. I know you're strong enough. I won't let one of my brothers fall, or lose to something like drugs.
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@dlcentaur Not even. I'm almost sure I made a mistake taking this. :/
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@yolodelerty Aww. Well, are you at least interested in what you're doing?
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@dlcentaur eh. Drugs aren't bad. They make you happy. We all want to be happy, don't we?
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@dlcentaur I was but it's dwindling.
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@renovatedkitchen They are bad. They screw with your mind, and alter your reality. They can destroy your life if you give them enough foothold. Happiness doesn't come in a shot, or through some pills.
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@yolodelerty Well, keep on pushing through, bro. It's true that you'll face times like that no matter how much you really like the subject matter. Just make sure you DO actually want to do what you're doing. x3
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@dlcentaur I'm not sure I do anymore, though.
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@dlcentaur happiness definitely comes in pills. Who cares if my reality is altered. Reality and all sucks. If my altered reality is where I will be happy, so be it. I'd rather live a short and happy life than a long life where almost everyday is spent in sadness and tears
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@renovatedkitchen But the worst thing about it is that it's all false. A manufactured sort of happiness that is no different than throwing your heart and mind to the wind. It hurts me that I can't help to make you feel better, man... #Hugs
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@dlcentaur it's alright. Either that or I fake being happy. It's false and I'm just lying to myself. It's easier to cope with sadness with drugs
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@renovatedkitchen Don't fake being happy. Be yourself. Be real. I'm not sure if you have anyone you can be with in reality, but you do have friends on here who are more than willing to spend some time cheering you up. c:
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@dlcentaur if I don't fake being happy I will flood the site with depressing thoughts. People don't like that. And it ain't really fair to them. It's my own fault for being depressing anyways so it ain't fair for me to shed depressing thinking on everyone
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@renovatedkitchen Don't flood the site with them. I can take 'em. Trust me, my tolerance has gotten incredibly high for such stuff.
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@dlcentaur it's no good anyway. I don't mind bottling it in. It's what I've always done. And no, because you are overly positive and that will drive me to anger/further sadness
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@renovatedkitchen Well, I usually only act overly positive because that's how I like to think. I'm a good deal more pragmatic when I'm serious.
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@dlcentaur I still dunno. I really don't mind bottling it in. It helps keep me angry at myself and gets me to ouch myself
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@renovatedkitchen But I don't want that for you... :C
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@dlcentaur it's kinda good. I just need a way to vent it. Once I gather too much I hear constant voices, and am always on the verge on snapping. Like I did today at work
