Dan's home timeline
Notices
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Make sure to visit Ross' grave today to pay your respects. Bring flowers. And lesbian porn.
Thursday, 06-Apr-17 20:28:47 UTC from web-
@actualrudolph Furry lesbian porn
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If Ross was still alive it would be his birthday
Thursday, 06-Apr-17 19:10:25 UTC from web -
If I'm just going about my day and you, someone I don't know, throws a water balloon at me, damn right I'm going to deck you in the cherrying skull
Tuesday, 04-Apr-17 22:30:26 UTC from web-
@tiffany You remind me of a time when someone tried to drive by water balloon a friend and I, and managed to instead throw a water balloon directly into their car stereo
Scribus likes this. -
@ceruleanspark I'm glad I could instil such a perfect blessing into your brain
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Congratulations on solving gods alphabet puzzle
Tuesday, 04-Apr-17 18:50:06 UTC from web -
That's how you indicate you want this massage to include a happy ending
Tuesday, 04-Apr-17 18:40:33 UTC from web -
Monday, 03-Apr-17 22:38:07 UTC from web -
This elevator is gonna be our coffin
Monday, 03-Apr-17 22:34:35 UTC from web -
I fixed the clock, so that probably broke everything else. At worst, it fixed federation.
Monday, 03-Apr-17 22:19:25 UTC from web -
BREAKING: Gibraltar calls EU a cuck http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/2017/04/03/eu-will-not-give-way-gibraltar-diplomats-say-talk-war-dismissed/
Monday, 03-Apr-17 20:12:08 UTC from web -
“I’ll go out and find some more of that Mulan Szechuan Teriyaki dipping sauce, Morty, because that’s what this is all about Morty – that’s my one-armed man! I’m not driven by avenging my dead family, Morty, that was fake, I’m driven by finding that McNugget sauce. I want that Mulan McNugget sauce, Morty, that’s my series arc, Morty, if it takes nine seasons, I want my McNugget dipping sauce Szechuan sauce, Morty, that’s what’s going to take us all the way to the end, Morty, nine more seasons Morty, nine more seasons until I get that dipping Szechuan sauce, for 97 more years, I want that McNugget sauce, Morty.”
Monday, 03-Apr-17 18:21:08 UTC from web- Scribus likes this.
- Gherkin ☑️ repeated this.
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I'm just gonna leave this here. http://rainbowdash.net/url/857918
Monday, 03-Apr-17 02:06:04 UTC from web-
@stumpuswhumpus Is this madoka
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http://i.imgur.com/fJOhz4u.jpg so that's where he went.
Monday, 03-Apr-17 10:37:12 UTC from web -
Nine seasons and a dipping sauce
Sunday, 02-Apr-17 18:03:13 UTC from web-
@ceruleanspark 97 years rick and morty
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@tiffany The government and your father crossed me Morty, and I made them go away.
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@ceruleanspark nuggets
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Destiny 2: September 8th. Bernie Sanders birthday. Coincidence? I think not.
Thursday, 30-Mar-17 18:42:42 UTC from web -
TFW you're trying to get ready for bed but your lights need a firmware update and you can't turn them off.
Tuesday, 28-Mar-17 22:13:28 UTC from web-
@ceruleanspark that's how the man gets you
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So Rob Schrab continues his campaign of kiwiing terror on twitter
Tuesday, 28-Mar-17 20:48:53 UTC from web -
It's unfortunate that the only trans* representation I can think of in Doctor Who is a stretched piece of skin and a horse
Tuesday, 28-Mar-17 14:25:25 UTC from web-
@thelastgherkin what about Misty
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@thelastgherkin Or that one time lord The Doctor shot in the face
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@ceruleanspark She's from Destiny
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Monday, 27-Mar-17 22:20:51 UTC from web -
In honor of national coming out day, I'd just like to say: You're all gay.
Monday, 20-Mar-17 19:14:27 UTC from web-
@ceruleanspark Gay for Moleman yes
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I'm glad the Chiliad Mystery Investigation is going so well and doesn't sound completely deranged at this point: http://i.imgur.com/IpJTKjh.jpg
Sunday, 19-Mar-17 23:23:43 UTC from web -
I'm a simple hitman. If you give me a target and have him stand anywhere near a woodchipper, one thing is going to lead to the other
Sunday, 19-Mar-17 23:09:10 UTC from web -
The problem with shaving is that I have to look at myself, which makes me want to commit suicide, but /not/ shaving leads to me developing a neckbeard, which /also/ makes me want to commit suicide.
Sunday, 19-Mar-17 22:07:39 UTC from web-
@ceruleanspark do what I do and get some Vietnamese lady who kiwi talks you to her colleagues in her own language to cut your face
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@mrmattimation Typical american attitude. "Just buy a person and make them do it"
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"If you are seen placing a mine, it will be considered a suspicious act" thanks hitman.
Sunday, 19-Mar-17 20:55:47 UTC from web -
There are no bees in Equestria
Sunday, 19-Mar-17 18:28:41 UTC from web-
@ceruleanspark There are no buses in Gensōkyō.
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@adiwan Close your eyes and visualise the following: You are running through a forest, and see a hive hanging low in the branch of a sycamore tree. If you do not know what a sycamore tree looks like, you can substitute oak, or cedar, or any other large tree. You think it may be fun to throw rocks at the hive. You are misguided. Bees begin pouring out. An unending torrent of bees. They are swarming you. They are stinging you, and you are flailing in a futile attempt to get them off. It's worse now and they have crawled inside of you. In through your tear ducts, and down your throat, muffling your screams. Now they are the ones that are desperate. Desperate to escape their new fleshy prison. They bite and sting, in an attempt to escape from you, but you have no way of letting them escape their bonds despite it being the only thing in the world that is important to you at this very moment.
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@ceruleanspark Nice creepypasta. 10/10 would post again.
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Mai just told Joey to kill himself
Sunday, 19-Mar-17 16:02:43 UTC from web-
@mrmattimation keep my beloved franchise out of your mouth
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@mrmattimation So no one told you life was gonna be this GAY
m14brony likes this.
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in another few hours the sun will rise
Sunday, 19-Mar-17 13:06:03 UTC from web-
@tiffany What the Fluffle Puff does that mean
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THE ONLY ONE WORTH WATCHING, MUSHI
Sunday, 19-Mar-17 12:27:38 UTC from web -
Living the Imperial dream: https://i.imgur.com/hJJ9ltO.jpg. Be Rich, Fly a Dick.
Sunday, 19-Mar-17 01:21:02 UTC from web -
pokemon
Saturday, 18-Mar-17 15:45:20 UTC from web-
@tiffany I wanna be the very BEST, THE BEST, THE BEST, THE BEST
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@ceruleanspark you can win it in a minute if you spin it spin it spin it
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I'll just leave this here https://github.com/reek/anti-adblock-killer
Sunday, 12-Mar-17 15:58:07 UTC from web
