Brandon Hal Kaufman's home timeline
Notices
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The dude from Master of Disguise is in my store right now pretending to be an Eastern European gambler who has no idea how to fill out a lottery card and is constantly getting something wrong no matter how many times the instructions are given to him.
Tuesday, 22-Nov-22 16:44:05 UTC from web -
I'm doing an anti-"No Shave November". Usually I shave myself every two weeks but this month I try to shave daily or every other day. My verdict so far: Daily shaving is not worth it as my beard grows so fast that I can feel the stubbles after an hour after the shave. Waxing my face is not an option.
Wednesday, 16-Nov-22 08:45:40 UTC from web-
@scribus Yeah. Even with an electric razor it's not very feasible to shave every day because of skin irritation. Honestly I rather prefer not to have a beard at all and would want a permanent hair follicle removal but the risk of scarring my skin on the face is too high.
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Was thinking about who I could get to voice Jesus in Swole Foods and realized I don’t have one (1) Jewish friend. These are the drawbacks to not being based in New York or Los Angeles like everyone else in my field.
Wednesday, 16-Nov-22 06:58:13 UTC from web-
@zeldatra Jesus was a roman-era Hebrew, so he's pretty distanced from modern day Jews. He's also only half Hebrew since only his mother's lineage can be traced, so arguably you could cast anyone eurasian for the role and not be too far off mark.
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@nerthos I’m not genuinely that invested in an accurate casting, I’m voicing a south Asian guy which I obviously am not, I just briefly thought it’d be funny to make my imaginary Jewish friend do it
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"Those lazy, lazy leaves"! I was taking the scenic route from shopping through the park and there I slid in a corner and fell. I lost all tyre grip because a brown and slimy moist pile of leaves in the curve acted like it's the best replacement for grease in that moment. Luckily there was not much damage. My pants got dirty, a scratch on my knee, and the side of my pedal was heavily scratched.
Saturday, 12-Nov-22 13:23:08 UTC from web -
Democrats are doing WHAT
Wednesday, 09-Nov-22 04:54:18 UTC from web -
Made myself a mudflap for my bicycle. I could buy one but all the ones for purchase are way too small for what I think I need. Mine reaches further down and is wider in the hopes it will catch more dirt and preventing all that dirt flinging on my shoes and pants.
Monday, 31-Oct-22 15:25:27 UTC from web-
@adiwan I used some leftover PVC tarp, 3d printed a small decorative clamping piece that clamps the tarp flap to the mud guard, a M3 screw, two washers, a M3 locknut. I found some mud flaps similar in size online but mine was basically 1€ in costs, including the misprints.
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also, i've finished the NES version of Gradius because for some reason i got hyped for shumps
Monday, 24-Oct-22 20:52:01 UTC from web -
so, anyway, i basically got a GF now. bet you didnt expect that
Sunday, 23-Oct-22 03:21:33 UTC from web-
@nerthos road trip road trip roadtriP ROAD TRIIPPP!!!I
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@nerthos i've been since msay, but i will go to france again in the end of november, for the last time finally
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@scribus I would still go on an RDN roadtrip no questions asked, even though I'd probably have to shoot someone a few hours in at this point. Bonus points for a certain someone, in his own words, wanting to hit me with a wrench but 100% not brave enough to actually try if in the same room.
You're cool though, so we can eat fries after the fights die down.
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Always pleasantly surprised to see this place still kicking
Monday, 24-Oct-22 01:08:08 UTC from web-
@whomst sup
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@thelastgherkin Hey there. How's it goin
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Working on a paid project over the next few weeks. I will post... MY contributions here when I'm allowed. I WILL NOT post the project itself or even give the name because Gherkin will nuke my account.
Friday, 21-Oct-22 01:44:47 UTC from web-
@scribus it's not, like, i'm working on kanye's next video or anything like that, I'm just doing some extra backgrounds and 3D work and stuff, but the artist leading the project is a NSFW artist so you can probably guess what context this space ship i'm modeling is going to appear in...
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your local console pleb bought yet another console. praise me http://rainbowdash.net/attachment/876261
Sunday, 09-Oct-22 15:15:07 UTC from web-
@scribus yeah, it is the japanese pc engine, now i only need the disk drivers
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going on two and a half months without seeing my stalker, just kinda waiting for her to show up
Friday, 14-Oct-22 03:52:38 UTC from web-
@zeldatra Good gun, a bit expensive for carry if you don't use it often though. I'm a beretta 9mm guy, always found them nice, they were the standard cop gun here for decades.
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@nerthos I don’t actually carry one, I was being a bit tongue in cheek when I said I needed one for defense, I learned how to use one and it’s what I use when I go to the range but the main reason I did it was for a private security job that would’ve provided one for me. Didn’t end up applying for the job though so it’s just one of those things I know how to do now with no real practical applications for the moment.
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@zeldatra Feign vulnerability to bait the cougars, sun tzu would be proud
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me: I think kanye west is misunderstood, he's mentally ill and he needs some help, and he's right about some things sometimes.
kanye literally the next day: i'm going to go joker mode on some JewsTuesday, 11-Oct-22 02:02:44 UTC from web -
I-66 coming out of Washington had a bunch of construction being done on it tonight which meant I couldn’t get into any of the exits leading home. The result is that I had to drive through the dying rural part of Northern Virginia to get home. Two lanes, one in each direction, on a winding, narrow, wooded road in a “The Hills Have Eyes” looking area, critters everywhere, ominous glimpses of dilapidated ranch-style homes with pickups and Trump 2024 signage, and just when you thought it couldn’t get any spookier, a decapitated deer laying in a pool of its own blood that I had to avoid running over. Jordan Peele couldn’t have depicted a more uncomfortable drive.
Thursday, 29-Sep-22 07:26:11 UTC from web-
@zeldatra this sounds like a genuinely exciting roadtrip, it needs spoopy music
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The legal-in-my-state substances I took hit me way harder than I thought they would last night. Maybe shouldn’t do that again.
Monday, 26-Sep-22 14:15:59 UTC from web-
@scribus there was apparently waaaaaay more THC in the edible than I thought. My brain basically shut down while my body went into autopilot and at some point I just decided to go to sleep because paranoia was setting in. I then slept for twelve hours, woke up, came to work, realized it was still kind of working its way through my system, it’s 3pm now and I’m only just feeling normal again.
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@zeldatra hahaha been there, man. Been there.... I was at a Christmas party, and the conversational peer of the Yule Log.
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Sometimes I wonder if I am insane or the world is insane.
Sunday, 25-Sep-22 19:55:12 UTC from web-
@adiwan We're currently going through the once-a-century social hysteria so at least one of them is true, the other requires more study.
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If anybody needs a unicorn cartoon fix https://www.cbr.com/phoebe-and-her-unicorn-nickelodeon-wins-screen-rights/ The comic is cute, I look forward to this
Saturday, 17-Sep-22 01:37:35 UTC from web -
Ooof... Robert Zemeckis can't do it right somehow. The Live-action Pinocchio is borderline bad.
Monday, 12-Sep-22 16:12:34 UTC from web -
starting the week to something cursed http://rainbowdash.net/attachment/876230
Monday, 12-Sep-22 13:39:17 UTC from web -
I think captchas will evolve in the next few years using A.I.-generated images. I expect that there is a prompt and the user has to decide which of the pictures were generated with that prompt.
Monday, 12-Sep-22 06:43:02 UTC from web-
@adiwan There are GANs for that. Wouldn't work for CAPTCHA
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@oracle I think you can make a GAN practically for everything in the realm of captchas. I think that it'll going the way I predict in order to enhance the generating models with A-B-testing (or other similar tests) by actual humans. The same as it is done now with captchas that ask humans to recognize traffic lights, cars, busses, zebra stripe crossings, bikes...
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They think: "Why don't we store everything flat, use compound foreign keys, and make relations as cumbersome to find out and create views that are less helpful as they do rarely use JOIN and use a BAZILLION of WHERE clauses. WHO NEEDS READABILITY AND PERFORMANCE?
Friday, 09-Sep-22 10:40:06 UTC from web-
@adiwan JOINS are inexpensive, but when you need do trillions of them, they become an obstacle. This problem was why Amazon created DynamoDB
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@oracle Well... It's not an environment with a ton of activity. A lot but not Amazon-a-lot. The database is an older Oracle installation because legacy software running needs exactly that old version. It stems from a time where entity frameworks were the rage and thus all objects were stored in a database. That same database is misused as a semi-persistent storage for message queues. In the recent past it was a few times as the culprit for some major downtime, as it is the biggest single point of failure without redundancy. I'm pretty soured by that.
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I am going to find it easier and faster to export 360 individual PNG files than figuring out OpenToonz
Tuesday, 30-Aug-22 04:54:56 UTC from web-
@scribus OpenToonz is quite genuinely the least user friendly animation program in the entire Galaxy universe. It was designed to be used exclusively by the guy who first invented it to color Family Guy digitally in 2001 and if you are anybody but that’s one guy you’re SOL.
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@zeldatra Definitely not touched by anybody who has at any point used anything resembling a mainstream graphics program
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Just got off the phone with a very angry customer. I am at home. Beyond furious.
Tuesday, 30-Aug-22 01:28:14 UTC from web-
@scribus no, thankfully, my assistant called me on his own phone specifically because the customer wanted to yell at me
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What the hell this place still exists? Hi I'm a girl now and I'm in Seattle for a pony convention
Saturday, 27-Aug-22 22:57:07 UTC from web-
@redenchilada Like an MLP pony thing, or an actual equestrian event?
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@redenchilada I picked a great time to log back on. How have you been?
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@oracle Hey right on, it's almost a reunion or resurgence here!
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I’m one of two white guys on the entire planet who wears Kangols and the other one is Eminem which probably doesn’t help my case much
Saturday, 27-Aug-22 12:47:06 UTC from web-
@zeldatra Just so long as you don't try wearing it backwards like Samuel Jackson you should be OK
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Re-upped all of my animation programs with an old email account I had from community college that I never lost access to, therefore qualifying for the much cheaper student pricing. Don’t be a snitch, ‘kay?
Saturday, 20-Aug-22 06:10:41 UTC from web-
@zeldatra My old school and university were very quick disabling my accounts. I had a month to backup everything. In that time I could snatch the last time a student discount on the Amazon Prime membership. For all the other stuff (except for cinema) the student discounts were for products that are too expensive to begin with, even with a meager discount of 5% to 10% like laptops. The only discount that I abused was getting Windows licenses for 10€ over the MSDN program my university was part of. I got licenses for the family and a hand full for me.
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@adiwan my state’s community college system oversees all forms of adult education so once you’re enrolled you’re never “unenrolled” in the sense that you’ll always be a student because they offer courses that don’t contribute to a degree, and you need the student email to enroll for it, therefore, for as long as I live in this state, I am a student and don’t have to pay $70 a month for ToonBoom
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Next clone was struck by lightning almost immediately upon arriving home. Didn’t die, but they definitely have some kind of hidden “unlucky” flag or something that’s causing this.
Friday, 19-Aug-22 13:14:59 UTC from web-
@zeldatra I made a spellcaster Zelda Hylia for laughs (and because I'd been obsessing with HW:AOC again) and she evidently really likes the clone spell. Now there's an Iliana and a Ciera and like 2 or 3 others walking around town, with wildly different behaviors. I first found out when I thought I had caught the princess skinny-dipping in the hot tub and saw that she had changed her name :p
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@scribus there are three different clones of my main sim wandering around town right now (not counting the dead one, RIP Francis) because it’s a shockingly common work goal at the top level of the scientist career and I am slightly concerned that the neighborhood will be overrun as caring for all of them is a chore and I’ve basically been moving them into the family bin one by one and marking them as “unplayed” so that their AI will try and ingratiate them into the neighborhood storytelling feature.
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Wow I got mail from VP Harris! Wonder which letter it's in response to (and how inflammatory I was)?
Friday, 19-Aug-22 19:22:41 UTC from web-
@zeldatra Mine turned out to be pretty much a form letter, probably the same text I'd have gotten from an e-mail
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Today in The Sims 4: Cloned myself. Twice. First clone was evil (ie a bit of a prick) so I abandoned him on the street. Second clone was a perfect copy, but he died in a freak accident literal hours after being created. I think I shouldn’t clone myself anymore.
Thursday, 18-Aug-22 07:42:53 UTC from web-
@scribus meant, then forgot, to do some research on whether or not clones have hidden flags that make them more susceptible to deadly game events, because he died an emotion-related death which i was fairly certain up until that point was nearly impossible unless you were intentionally trying to cause it.
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@zeldatra I had the mom in one of my families die of laughter out of the blue. But I guess it was only *once* so
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oh please oh please oh please don’t let this jury summons be the Chris Chan trial
Tuesday, 16-Aug-22 00:32:54 UTC from web-
@scribus I was talking with a friend last night, like, there’s no way this person gets a fair trial from anyone under the age of 40, right? Jury selection’s gonna be rough.
