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dying
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:02:58 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:03:34 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal probably not possible
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:03:56 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:04:29 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal good luck, but I am dying hopefully
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:04:56 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:07:30 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal but i long for the sweet release of death
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:07:55 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:08:28 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal um no
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:09:22 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:10:27 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal that's a good one man
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:11:29 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:12:39 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal I have very large doubts about the validity of that statement.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:14:21 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:16:31 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal I can see the truth
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:17:31 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:19:16 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal what
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:19:30 UTC from web-
@yodelerty I'm playing with your metaphor. You said you can see the truth, but I'm inferring about how a person would have to see them-self through a reflective surface, so the reflective surface you're looking at to see yourself does not reflect the truth.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:22:03 UTC from web-
@nethernarwhal The mirror's about as accurate as it gets though, isn't it?
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:23:46 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:24:50 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal The mirror is the opposite in that but the principle of my point is the same
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:25:31 UTC from web -
@nethernarwhal Maybe. Though I'm probably right anyway because I have to deal with me more than anyone else so I know my worth the best, wouldn't you say?
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:26:05 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:27:01 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal I have, yeah.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:29:04 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:29:37 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal It could be. Though it hardly matters in terms of me since I know I'm pretty much useless to myself anyway
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:32:40 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:37:49 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal Nah, I deserve it. I should have been more actively trying to figure out myself when I was a kid and now it's too late.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:39:20 UTC from web-
@yodelerty No one should be expected to know their whole life plan as a kid. I'm in my late teens and still have no idea where I'll end up. You DON'T deserve it Dane, and the first step to feeling better is telling yourself that every day.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:42:18 UTC from web-
@nethernarwhal You're in your late teens and you have a passion and something you're good at. I'm in my early twenties and I'm bad at everything and like nothing. I should be dead for being this terrible. No human this worthless should exist really
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:44:13 UTC from web-
@yodelerty Except making a decent living through music is incredibly difficult, if anything it's more of a hobby and occasional pastime with friends. I love music, my drumming in particular, more than anything but I currently don't want to rely on it for my future.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:46:08 UTC from web-
@nethernarwhal Like I said, you have a passion and something you're good at. That at least gives you a pastime, something I'd love beyond anything else to have. And later in life just means I'll be dead before it happens. Because I don't do anything but work and sleep and play video games and cry. Long story short, I'm pathetic. That's why I think I'd be better off dying. At least then I wouldn't have to deal with my loser self.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:48:57 UTC from web-
@yodelerty How about reading? It's actually a lot of fun and the more you do the more you'll find where your interests lie.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:51:29 UTC from web-
@nethernarwhal I haven't read a book in over three years.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:54:49 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:03:03 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal Except I have no idea what I like, like I said before
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:04:14 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:07:20 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal action/adventure, some RPGs but not many (mostly action RPGs tbh), a couple racing games, party games occasionally, some rhythm games, and maybe a few more. No idea.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:09:05 UTC from web-
@yodelerty Well, for some of the adventure and RPG game narratives, maybe try and find similar books? I'm really pulling what I can, but I always find reading really therapeutic and it's easy to get into.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:13:33 UTC from web-
@nethernarwhal Reading really isn't easy to get into. I can't concentrate when I read. Or when I do anything really. ADHD and stuff, which I don't take medication for anymore.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:15:52 UTC from web-
@yodelerty Well, I guess when you put it that way... Maybe just take small steps at first like read one chapter every now and then and work your way up (like doing running and gradually increasing your distance), though this will probably hardly help you given your condition.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:19:27 UTC from web-
@nethernarwhal i love reading
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:20:25 UTC from web-
@lunaloverchay Me too, I need to make more time for it. Though I've been more into reading contemporary philosophy and manga these days (not that the latter technically counts)
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:22:26 UTC from web-
@nethernarwhal anime yay i saw tons of sword art online cosplays
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:23:37 UTC from web-
@lunaloverchay I liked the first half of season 1 for SAO, but since then it's considerably dropped in quality for me. Which is a shame because I usually dig the theme of virtual reality.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:25:35 UTC from web-
@nethernarwhal i hope it happens
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:26:35 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal Nope! I'll likely start reading and then say I'm going to read more and then won't. Example: I said I was going to practice my bass guitar tomorrow. The kicker: I said that over two years ago and it still hasn't happened. I suck.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:20:54 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:22:55 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal It's a little too late to keep lying to myself that I'll ever be good at it, isn't it? I could I guess but I don't have a tuner.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:25:32 UTC from web-
@yodelerty Learning should not be about getting amazing right away, and it's also not something you should compare yourself to others while doing. It is a personal endeavor that you can conquer at your own pace if you practice.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:26:47 UTC from web-
@nethernarwhal Learning also requires general interest in the topic at hand, and since I have zero interest in anything anymore practicing my bass would just be me pretending I'm playing anything for about 10 minutes until I start crying and have to lay down for a couple hours like it has been in the past.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:28:41 UTC from web-
@yodelerty Look, I can't force you to be interested in anything, but I think sometimes you don't realize how much you might enjoy something if you don't put any time into it.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:30:42 UTC from web-
@nethernarwhal True, but since I have no idea what I could ever be interested in, and given there's an infinite number of possibilities of things for me to try, how am I ever supposed to know? Basically if I had tried before I became depressed and slowly transformed into the worst person on the planet, I wouldn't even be in this situation. And now I'm basically screwed because I haven't had any motivation for years to do anything at all. All in all, I really should kill myself since I'll never enjoy anything again odds are.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:34:53 UTC from web-
@yodelerty Killing yourself won't make things better for you and will only make things worse for people who care about you.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:37:42 UTC from web-
@nethernarwhal It'll certainly keep me from wasting my time pretending that one day I might actually enjoy life.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:41:33 UTC from web-
@yodelerty ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ At least enjoy these hearts then, for me ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:43:27 UTC from web-
@nethernarwhal They're lovely
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:44:06 UTC from web-
@yodelerty They're all for you, actually have some more because you deserve them ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:45:42 UTC from web-
@nethernarwhal We've been over this: I don't deserve anything but death.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:46:17 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:47:06 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal Why?
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:47:14 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:47:55 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal That's really weird. There's nothing to like. It makes sense that I really like you though because you're amazing.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:49:01 UTC from web-
@yodelerty You're kind, respectful, honest, and see me for who I am. You're a great listener and you're really great at seeing the goodness in other people. Not to mention you're a fellow Canadian.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:53:46 UTC from web-
@nethernarwhal Besides Canadian, I really don't know where you got any of that. I'm none of those things. I'm the worst. None of that makes sense..
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:57:02 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:58:08 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal Actually? That can't be right
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:59:26 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:02:15 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal I guess your opinion can't be wrong..
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:03:06 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:04:03 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal Perhaps the potential could actually gain some momentum for once, on the odd chance I actually have any potential.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:05:22 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:06:21 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal Hard to see what doesn't present itself in any form.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:07:25 UTC from web-
@yodelerty Unfortunately, it won't come easy. But know I'll always be 3 provinces over rooting for you every step of the way.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:11:48 UTC from web-
@nethernarwhal I'm so sorry for whatever I did to make you have this faith in me. I really am.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:12:44 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:18:48 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal Well, thanks. I'm going to apologize in advance for when I inevitably disappoint you or drive you away like most of my friends.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:20:43 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:22:47 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal I always try. I just don't succeed. But yeah, I promise.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:24:51 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:28:34 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal True. I usually try then cry.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:29:10 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:30:45 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal I could do that.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:31:42 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:35:49 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal Whenever I actually have something I want to try. Not that I ever do.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:36:57 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:39:26 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal I'll probably be waiting another 10 years. Maybe more.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:39:58 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:40:42 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal So probably like 10 years for me then for anything to pop up.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:41:48 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:42:37 UTC from web
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@yodelerty You deserve ponies. Because ponies pony, pony! And pony puts the win in winning people. http://rainbowdash.net/attachment/794673
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@yodelerty The best advice I have ever been given, don't try to do what you want to do. do things that get you out of your comfort zone. Do things, you think you may not like doing.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:39:24 UTC from web-
@potatao That's literally everything.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:41:44 UTC from web-
@yodelerty Then do that, do what you hate or find tedious. Get it beat. It is where some of the greatest and most humbling moments of life exist.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:43:30 UTC from web-
@potatao I'm not going to do literally everything, that doesn't make sense and I'll be dead before I find something I really like
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:44:56 UTC from web-
@yodelerty XD Yeah, true bro. But, you could do what you can. I don't think I meant to do literally everything, but, everything you can do in your lifetime. I am sorry. Shall I stop here?
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:46:10 UTC from web-
@potatao Up to you. And I'd prefer not to be 80 when I find something I like. Because then who cares? Worthless.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:46:57 UTC from web-
@yodelerty That isn't likely to happen. You may not find a hobby, honestly, that isn't what life should be about, too simple and boring. Life is about work, and what happens when you work. But, there comes a moment when work becomes something more, and, it can be an experience that can change the way you see things and your own self perception. No mater how small.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:54:59 UTC from web-
@potatao To be fair I don't really think an average 9-5 (or whatever his timeslot is) job at a department store can really change his life
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:56:23 UTC from web-
@nethernarwhal ... *facepalms* Work is not just, you know, doing something for like a bureaucracy, but, it can be farming, hiking, picking god forsaken dead from the road. murdock, work, in the general term. He can find something. But again, maybe I am being too idealistic. I don't know man. Take something a bit, unorthodox.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:58:20 UTC from web-
@potatao If you're referring to work as just putting energy into something then he'll hopefully find something but if you mean his vocation then his current one isn't his final goal.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:00:30 UTC from web-
@nethernarwhal Yeah, the former. I guess. Never mind. I was not the person who is smart enough to talk about this any ways.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:01:18 UTC from web-
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:01:52 UTC from web
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@potatao I work at a department store from 8 to 5. It's pretty boring. I don't learn anything and I make $13/hour. I don't see that becoming something more than some thing I can't wait to be rid of.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:58:33 UTC from web-
@yodelerty I was in a similar situation, as I have been doing stultifying janitorial work for over 11 years. I developed major depressive disorder, but I am fortunate in that medical treatment enabled me to overcome depression's debilitating effects.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:06:39 UTC from web-
@m14brony And now you're interested in a variety of things I see. Medical treatment has done nothing for my depression.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 05:08:16 UTC from web
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@yodelerty As I said in one of Skype conversations, some people just find their callings later in life.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:46:58 UTC from web
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@nethernarwhal well im 14 idon't know what will happen to me
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:47:29 UTC from web-
@lunaloverchay I didn't know jack when I was 14, you have plenty of time man
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:48:00 UTC from web-
@nethernarwhal i know i have time i'm working on an English assignment im so tried of english
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:50:55 UTC from web-
@lunaloverchay I've usually had a pretty easy time BS'ing my way through English classes, though perhaps it's just one of stronger subjects to begin with
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:53:35 UTC from web-
@nethernarwhal math and science are mine
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 03:54:08 UTC from web-
@lunaloverchay That's good, being good at math will help you out a lot when you're older
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:03:43 UTC from web-
@nethernarwhal a kid at my school named gabe bullies me because im a brony + he thinks its funny to get people angry
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:05:52 UTC from web-
@lunaloverchay Protip: Ignore him, and if he continues, tell an adult.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:07:05 UTC from web-
@nethernarwhal I've told him bro your making it hard to love and tolerate
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:08:42 UTC from web-
@lunaloverchay Just politely tell him you're entitled to your opinion of what shows you enjoy
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:09:47 UTC from web-
@nethernarwhal he said he wants to be my friend im trying to find fellow bronies at my school
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:11:14 UTC from web-
@lunaloverchay If he wants to be your friend he shouldn't be bullying you
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:12:21 UTC from web-
@nethernarwhal he's started to stop bulling
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:13:36 UTC from web-
@lunaloverchay Well that's good, hopefully that will continue
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:14:12 UTC from web-
@nethernarwhal me too
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:14:37 UTC from web-
@lunaloverchay As you get older you'll go to new places and meet new people, if you're kind and open minded you can usually eventually find someone who likes you for you. I know I have.
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:17:48 UTC from web-
@nethernarwhal i went to salt lake city comic con met 6 fellows bronies and pegasisters i kept giving people brohoofs
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:19:22 UTC from web-
@lunaloverchay Sounds like a blast, it's cool to meet people with the same interests as you
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:19:57 UTC from web-
@nethernarwhal it was im hoping i met some one from here their
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:20:58 UTC from web
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@lunaloverchay Hmmm, do you want a former enemy to be your friend? I have heard they can be ones greatest ally in this. Now, why is he asking this?
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:13:05 UTC from web-
@potatao yes
Wednesday, 22-Oct-14 04:13:47 UTC from web
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