Ivy Jinx's home timeline
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Michael Bay’s new movie is about a bizarro alternate universe where the US government is mishandling a pandemic, but I did the math and I’m 95% certain the virus would have died out by killing all of its hosts too fast to find new ones under the conditions portrayed in the film.
Thursday, 14-Jan-21 10:23:44 UTC from web-
@mrmattimation Wait, really? Not that he'd botch the math, that I super-believe... But the whole-ass movie??
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@scribus yeah, look up “Songbird” sometime. Written at the very beginning of the pandemic and filmed almost entirely by the cast with cell phones, it takes place in 2024 in a world where COVID mutated into a deadly super virus which kills 50% of the people it infects, anyone who gets it is automatically reported to the government via smartphone tracking, and they’re quarantined in a concentration camp until they either die or get better. I’m no virologist, but I’m pretty sure that under those conditions, the virus would have been dealt with a long time ago.
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@mrmattimation I mean considering what a 3% mortality rate did to us, I must be inclined to agree, one way or another...
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Watched this documentary on "deep time" and human history last night. It was all like, "Columbus set sail because 5 billion years ago a planetoid hit proto-Earth, causing the axial tilt which resulted in the weather patterns which led to spices growing in India. Meanwhile, the Portuguese got rich off of a dying star 7 billion years ago, which resulted in a silver deposit in modern-day Mexico..."
Wednesday, 13-Jan-21 20:41:07 UTC from web-
@scribus And then the Saudis got rich because a bunch of dinosaurs and old plants decided to rot below the earth and turn into a slimey liquid.
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Also Chris Krebs accidentally said “erection” on national television instead of “election” and that’s inspired me to write a cartoon about “erection fraud”
Monday, 11-Jan-21 00:10:59 UTC from web-
@mrmattimation I liked the guy who described fences as being "hall" (high+tall)
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Sunday, 10-Jan-21 19:13:32 UTC from web
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@mrmattimation Y'know I'm starting to suspect it's less mental gymnastics, and more like mental scoliosis
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@mrmattimation And also, just, everything is on fire, why not
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The longer I search for houses the more depressed I get.
Sunday, 10-Jan-21 15:58:20 UTC from web -
One day I’ll have to answer for a few of the people I used to associate with and I can’t really think of anything better than “I had bad character judgement skills when I was 19”
Sunday, 10-Jan-21 01:44:52 UTC from web-
@mrmattimation I mean, I really don't see (especially after time has passed) why people can't accept "saw what they were, told them to split/split myself." The whole "Crap the uprising failed, uuhhhh Sowwy?" move is obviously weak, but I mean really! 19! NOBODY is good at 19!!
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@scribus The one I’m really worried about does backend stuff now for a certain wildly popular (especially with teenage American girls????) animated web series and I don’t wanna be the dickhole who sets that team back again so I’ve been thinking about getting in touch with the current show runner to let him know what I know so that it doesn’t bite ALL of us in the ass at some point in the future.
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I have banned Donald Trump from the Rainbow Dash Network
Saturday, 09-Jan-21 09:46:35 UTC from web- Scribus and ric drasin like this.
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@thelastgherkin Who else can teach the yellow tan monster friendship?
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@adiwan Iiiiii think he's just gonna have to be imprisoned in the statue garden for a couplefew thousand years...
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You wouldn’t find a more ridiculous scenario in a Grand Theft Auto game: Trump’s personal Twitter account getting banned means that his official business account, @POTUS, has lost about half of its tweets to the point where the last thing on its page now is a White House retweet from last month and the most recent tweet from Trump himself is from July... of *2017*.
Saturday, 09-Jan-21 00:39:41 UTC from web-
@mrmattimation I dunno, one time my buddy fell off of a parking garage whilst riding a motorcycle, landed on a brick wall, and rode all the way to the end of the block, lol
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I haven't eaten an "Amerikaner" for a long time. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Black_and_white_cookie Here it's mostly sold with only white glazing.
Friday, 08-Jan-21 19:54:35 UTC from web-
@scribus I'm not a pumpkin guy but I imagine a simple chunky butter wheat cookie covered with a sugar glazing and small caramelized pumpkin chunks.
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@adiwan I'm actually using a basic sugar cookie, plus some gourd puree and relevant spices, a little maple syrup. So far, so good. Last time I was out of cinnamon so they were a bit more like ginger snaps than pie, like I'd hoped, but the texture was great and they worked even without the cinnamon. May cut down the cloves, though...
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I was sooo optimstic that everything would be over sooner. I was thinking it'd be like SARS and MERS when it comes to the global impact. Serious but much more contained. How foolish I was.
Friday, 08-Jan-21 16:36:52 UTC from web -
2020 Part 2 Electric Boogaloo
Thursday, 07-Jan-21 07:10:22 UTC from web-
@scribus 2022 will be 2020 Part 3: Return of the King. The end will be very long and will end many times, and will have a war towards the end with the remaining forces of evil. But it will finally be a new age of mankind.
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So definitely far enough away that nothing had really changed in the neighborhood, but close enough that you start to think for a bit "oh, mango, what if this spills over"
Thursday, 07-Jan-21 21:43:10 UTC from web-
@mrmattimation Well, here's hoping the next attack is equally unsuccessful, I guess.
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So you can imagine how I, someone who lives twenty minutes from where that all went down, wish I had worn brown pants today.
Thursday, 07-Jan-21 09:40:25 UTC from web-
@mrmattimation That was a hell of a thing
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@mrmattimation Also, not sure the miles to minutes ratio outside of CA, but damn dude
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@scribus honestly, it's twenty minutes to get to the metro station which takes me into the district proper, longer if you try to drive into the district. I live really, really close to the city BUT there's pretty much only one bridge going into and out of the city on the Virginia side, not sure if it's the same story in Maryland. And traffic on that bridge is always, always terrible. I used to drive into Alexandria once a week for school - Alexandria being one of the two cities that borders Washington on this side of the river - and even THAT is a complete nightmare. Definitely not as bad as going from, say, Glendale to Los Angeles, based on photos I've seen, but still pretty bad.
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So, when's the next episode of pony??
Wednesday, 06-Jan-21 23:40:36 UTC from web-
@adiwan Right about now, a mule kick in the junk sounds preferable to life in America
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I was viewing a house for purchase but as I stepped in it was worse and worse the further it got. The seller wanted almost 300000€ but the stuff to repair and renovate can be summed up to 100000€ with ease. It looked OK fine from the outside but inside the house showed every bit of horror. The rooms have cracks in the wall. The cellar reeks of oil and had water damage (apparently fixed but I don't believe it's over). The windows are leaky. The thermal isolation has to be improved all around. It needs a new heater in 10 years.
Monday, 04-Jan-21 17:46:07 UTC from web-
@adiwan Water damage is never *truly* fixed (he said with the full extent of his real estate "experience" being haunted house horror flicks)
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@scribus Yeah. It didn't bode when It was said that water pushed through the wall from the outside. There was a new isolating sheet installed but my suspicion alarm went off hard. There was only one side fixed and my fear was that the other sides were ticking time bombs.
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"Sleeveless trenchcoat" probably is not the look I imagine it to be
Sunday, 03-Jan-21 20:45:54 UTC from web -
Don’t worry/I’m sorry, I didn’t die in the mass shooting that just happened here
Sunday, 03-Jan-21 00:39:32 UTC from web-
@scribus Not as bad as some we saw pre-pandemic - the police were already nearby because of a robbery that had occurred in the same plaza earlier in the day - but the Wal-Mart I do some of my shopping at a few minutes down the road just got shot up.
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@mrmattimation Only thing Google showed me was "In 2020, there WERE no Mass Shootings!"
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@scribus How unfortunate that it took a global pandemic to get our first shooting-free year in two decades
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Hey guys, if anyone wants to make a quick buck, the gold prices are likely to increase to by about 100$ an ounce in the next week due to the recent QE / Defense Budget
Thursday, 31-Dec-20 23:54:06 UTC from web-
@oracle If you guys listened to me, you can now sell that Gold. About 100$ of gains
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Watched Shazam! yesterday on Netflix for the first time. It was... fine I guess. It didn't blew me away. Still a ton better than the other DC dumpster fires.
Thursday, 31-Dec-20 09:05:57 UTC from web-
@adiwan It was a bit cookie-cutter and obvious, but it was a lot of fun! I want more fun in my movies. I'm over the grit; I think I was there a bit too early, it's worn out its novelty, lol.
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@scribus It made attempts to be "fun", however I wasn't a big fan of the way it tried to present it. I got a huge character whiplash from Billy Batson in his normal and hero form. I've never had the feeling they were the same character. I can commend the jokes but they were not much of a hit for me.
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@adiwan I think that might be a lore problem, there have been times where the kid and hero were pretty separate beings (at least, as I've read online; no firsthand comic experience, here). But I can totally see that being a thing.
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Back to the Future’s most egregious presumption was that Marty McFly would need entirely different money to buy things in 2015, as if money from 1985 would be no good thirty years later.
Tuesday, 29-Dec-20 00:01:37 UTC from web-
@mrmattimation I've worked alongside cashiers who were suspicious of money old enough to be of a design they didn't remember. I, myself, have been taken aback by the changes when I come across an old bill.
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@scribus Maybe it’s just because I, being the guy who counts the money at the end of the night, see bills from back when we only had 48 states more often than one normally does.
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@mrmattimation My mom used to keep small bills on hand at work for when something neat or rare came through, so she could swap them out and bring it home.
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how do people even find weed guys
Sunday, 27-Dec-20 21:47:36 UTC from web-
@mrmattimation There's that "make up a guy" twitter, maybe they can help?
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Any conspiracy theorists here who believe this who Covid-19 thing is a contrived event?
Saturday, 26-Dec-20 20:46:30 UTC from web-
@ricd personally i think Covid is a hoax created for and by the Chinese to make American business less competitive /s
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@mrmattimation And *I* think that hoaxes themselves are psychic virii developed by Russian mystics, but you don't hear me going on about it
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DON'T EVEN TRY SUGGESTING DUCK DUCK GO, I AM INFURIATED ENOUGH WITH THEM ON A GOOD DAY
Wednesday, 23-Dec-20 06:45:22 UTC from web-
@scribus God I tried them for a while, but then I got sick of never being able to find anything
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@ceruleanspark I've just decided to convince Google that I must have a pack of unruly children by searching "poop" followed by "pooop" "pooooooop" and "puup"
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@scribus There used to be a browser extension for that.
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It also has a backstory in which there was a civil war on Pac World in which Pac-Man’s father, the ORIGINAL Pac-Man, had every single person on the losing side, soldier and civilian alike, executed, and sent to hell, presumably including women and children (the main four ghosts are teenagers). The President of Pac-World, whose brother is the ghost king, keeps the BODY of every single one of the executed soldiers in cold storage as a trophy, and the show’s main conflict revolves around the ghosts trying to get their bodies back.
Wednesday, 23-Dec-20 04:17:40 UTC from web-
@mrmattimation Or a grapeing plot arc jfc wtf
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Man animating Among Us characters is kiwiin easy, I wish I coulda done this instead of ponies and skeletons
Tuesday, 22-Dec-20 22:58:27 UTC from web-
@mrmattimation How's the Pac-Man fan scene?
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@mrmattimation Some properties just don't need a third dimension
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Speaking of having nothing whatsoever to do, how fares the UK with its mutant COVID strain and tier-4 lockdowns?
Monday, 21-Dec-20 18:23:33 UTC from web-
@adiwan I get it mixed up sometimes too since I have no stake in it. The latest drama with Ireland is the EU wanting to check goods coming across the Irish Sea so companies can't dodge taxes by going through the North-South border, I think. I may have that mixed up. The UK is obviously mangoed off about that because North Ireland is part of the UK, obviously. I was talking to someone up there when I was in Belfast, and they gave the impression that it was going to cut them off economically and actively harm North Irelanders (at least from what my anxious mind was able to gather), which seems hilariously false if you think about it for two seconds. The goods will still flow, just not in the completely hands off way that the UK demands.
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@thismightbeauser Maybe I should say North-Republic border? I dunno
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@adiwan I thought that everyone involved would have demanded a pause on Brexit earlier this year, but it continues.
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So, SNL sure was live this Saturday night
Sunday, 20-Dec-20 07:38:48 UTC from web -
The most frustrating thing in the world is not being trusted despite the evidence, the adversary lying, and the controlling entity effectively doing nothing.
Tuesday, 15-Dec-20 21:17:41 UTC from web-
@scribus you're dann right. It's like smashing the head against an impenetrable and indestructible wall.
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If your dad wants to feel old, the girl from Steely Dan's "Hey 19" would be 59 today (and to make me feel old, just ask who Steely Dan are)
Monday, 14-Dec-20 08:13:44 UTC from web-
@scribus Wow uuhhh I'm suddenly not sure how this works, realized my own dad is a year YOUNGER than this??? haha what even is "dad rock," my dad's more into the blues, anyway...
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subscribe to my only fans to get that same picture but with nipples painted on top only $79.99 a month
Sunday, 13-Dec-20 09:07:12 UTC from web-
@mrmattimation I LOVE furry art that has nipples on top of the fur!!
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