Notices by Matt (zeldatra), page 31

Matt

Not sure if I mentioned this here yet but towards the end of last year I made the decision to move to the United Kingdom for a couple of years to be closer to my friends & develop Swole Foods with a team of creatives dotted around England, Northern Ireland, and the Netherlands, so this year I hope to begin the long & soul crushing process of acquiring a visa that’ll allow me to live in places other than on my friend’s couch. I’ve been told the requirements for non-Commonwealth citizens are somehow even stricter than the US’s, so I don’t expect this to be particularly easy or even for it to be finished by year’s end, but I think this’ll be good for me.

Matt

in case anyone is wondering if I ever stopped getting these kinds of comments: I haven’t. http://rainbowdash.net/url/876303

Matt

the honorable (he’s been crying a bit) http://rainbowdash.net/url/876302

Matt

Warzone 2 is a shocking downgrade from the first game. The only redeeming factor was a 10 year old from Saudi Arabia called me the n word an hour into the game, it was the only English word he knew I think

Matt

(It was tax-related. If they can’t even cut my taxes what good are Republicans? Because that was the last thing they could have done for me.)

Matt

Governor Youngkin appears to be half-assing the one proposal he had that I supported, almost as if he’s trying to be as unlikable as possible.

Matt

My cat scratched himself just below his ear and then shook his head and sprayed blood everywhere, intentionally making it look like a goddamn murder scene. He’s fine. The wall is not.

Matt

I have an unreleased My Little Brony-era cartoon from 2013 making fun of John Boehner so really I’m just revisiting my roots.

Matt

Took a break from regular stuff to do a quick cartoon spoofing Kari Lake and there’s a nonzero chance her social media team starts going after me for it because they seem to just be going after everyone who goofs on her. Should be out this weekend.

Matt

Are cable installers everywhere absurdly lazy or are me and my friends just unlucky, because the Verizon guy is literally lying about whether or not he’s been to the apartment right now

Matt

Turn on Fox News. Senator Kennedy talking about how Democrats eat vegetables which is why we can’t vote for them. Turn off Fox News. That is my daily recommended intake of Fox News.

Matt

Admittedly I only have east coast prices to compare it to but I’m going to assume cigarette prices on the west coast are more comparable to New York than Virginia or North Carolina

Matt

Somebody’s gonna cancel me one day for all the racist things I’ve said and continue to say about the Welsh but that’s not really fair because I’m not 100% certain that Wales is even a real place.

Matt

I can fix Kanye

Matt

Just learned that the company changed what is considered overtime on me so now the schedule I’ve been working for three years includes close to twenty hours of time and a half pay, while I’m trying to qualify for ADU. Whoops?

Matt

This racist pedophile customer trusts me with entirely too much personal information, as evidenced by what he is known to me as

Matt

Just woke up from a dream that Elon Musk had developed a portable oxygen bubble that you could activate from your phone on a subscription model and on the day it launched the service drained the earth of all of its oxygen due to a programming fault, which led to only the people with the subscription being able to breathe and most others dying. Wrote every detail down because it’d make a great satirical disaster film. Back to sleep with me.

Matt

Plus there’s the town priest, his kid brother sidekick, the FBI agent who blackmails the main character into doing crimes for him, the President of the United States, myself who may or may not still be a horse from that one thing, the main character’s dead father, her half-brother… basically everyone except the main character and the local bartender. Aiming to cut that down at least by half once I have the resources, either after a successful television pitch or funding by some other means (Kickstarter?)

Matt

That sounds flippant - obviously if I had the time, money, and resources to find the very best person for these roles I would, because voicing 80% of the male voices myself - shockingly! - leads to a cast of people that all sound the same. The south Asian guy is gay and I also voice his boyfriend (a Republican congressman, because I’m inclusive :)), which means I’m also grapeing myself kind of a lot. I voice the main character’s best friend, who the south Asian guy hates, so on top of Fluffle Puffing myself, I also have to hate myself. It’s truly the worst form of MPD.

Matt

The dude from Master of Disguise is in my store right now pretending to be an Eastern European gambler who has no idea how to fill out a lottery card and is constantly getting something wrong no matter how many times the instructions are given to him.

Matt

I am an AMERICAN and should be able to come and go as I please, Britain is literally 1984, what kind of a democracy doesn’t welcome people from other societies with open arms, I can’t even imagine the kind of government that would subject people to this kind of mistreatment and

Matt

Been trying to look into moving to the UK so I can be in the same time zone as basically everyone I work with on YouTube but immigration laws are tight af there, might have to marry that girl I met in Peacehaven for citizenship.