Matt (zeldatra)

Matt

in hindsight, maybe telling your voter base that their vote won't matter because it's all rigged anyway the day BEFORE the election isn't a fantastic idea?

Matt

this reminds me of Virginia four years ago when everyone thought the election was gonna be close, and then it wasn't and campaigns were sitting around figuring out just what the hell to say because nobody expected to be speaking so early in the night

Matt

...wait... that's not the band. That's a recording of the song. I think the band left.

Matt

the band is now playing "Money (That's What I Want)", over/under on them getting paid tonight?

Matt

the live band is playing "I'm a Believer", you cannot make this apple up

Matt

Larry Elder's live stream is so funny. Everyone there thinks he won, they haven't told anyone the actual results. It's like looking into another universe.

Matt

Caitlin Jenner didn't even come close. NOW how will I make my clickbait cartoons??

Matt

Norm MacDonald died. That’s not funny at all. :(

Matt

I have the Governor Jenner story arc READY TO GO. You know. Just in case the funniest thing that’s ever happened happens.

Matt

is today a bad day to announce that i started writing a Swole Foods episode where the Taliban moves into the neighborhood and tries to impress the neighbors, much to the suspicion of Mo, who’s old enough to remember the last time the Taliban lived in the area twenty years ago

Matt

big fan of the new No Man's Sky glitch where the player will launch into the sky for seemingly no reason, die upon hitting the ground, and then have their gravesite deleted because the planet somehow unloaded in the interim. Very well-designed game they've made here

Matt

new movie idea: final destination 9/11

Matt

This customer who I’m fairly certain is a pedophile keeps on trying to talk to me when he’s in the store. Please stop trying to be my friend sir, it’s not gonna happen

Matt

when I was looking through Mind Control’s .fla file yesterday I lol’d at 2012 Matt’s implicit assertion that Sarah Palin was the most evil and incompetent person the Republican Party could ever nominate

Matt

I drew this one at work! http://rainbowdash.net/url/875990

Matt

all of this moving around between stores finally pays off - I finally have the evidence I need to have a certain customer banned from all of our stores because I personally saw him running the same scam at three separate stores. kinda weird that it took three separate stores though, right?

Matt

It’s the greatest country on earth until Verizon goes down, and given that they have a monopoly in the DC area, that means the entire batcaveing DMV has no internet now

Matt

Gotta say, “I got covid from black people” is not something you ever wanna hear from an elected official

Matt

whatever you may be thinking, i did NOT cheat to get the secret ending in Birth By Sleep because the final task needed for 100% completion was based in tedium and not skill. I did NOT, under any circumstances, open Cheat Engine, systematically figure out the hex value for my kill count by killing enemies one by one and seeing which values increased, and then bump those numbers way up to unlock the secret ending early. I did not do that. It would have taken more skill than doing it the real way, but I wouldn't know that, because I didn't do that.

Matt

Unlike her millennial counterparts, Sora and Riku, who are both very emotionally driven and who, for better or worse, derive morality from what they believe in their hearts is right, to the point that they will at times disregard logic, reason, and even common sense if something leads them to believe that the logically correct solution to a problem is not the most morally correct, Aqua is cold and calculating and genuinely cannot fathom the idea that somebody can do the wrong thing for a cause they believe to be just. In her final conversation with Terra at the end of Birth by Sleep, when he confirms to her that he killed their master, mentor, and father figure while attempting to protect Ventus, she both refuses to believe that Terra could have any good left in him, AND seems to imply that emotions themselves are dangerous and lead to the darkness.

Matt

Aqua, supposedly one of the “big good” characters, has an incredibly difficult time showing any emotion whatsoever. A naive player may chalk this up to her voice actress having never done a voice role before or since. But if you REALLY look into it, you’ll find that the character is just generally emotionally detached from everything around her - during what we assume is her first encounter with death, she immediately proclaims that it was “the darkness” that took the life of Cinderella’s step-sisters. She adopts this mindset with just about every tragedy that strikes from there on, but that’s not all. She spends a good portion of the game willfully misleading people for seemingly no reason, gaslighting Ventus and Terra among others, and her sense of right and wrong is incredibly binary and reveals that she has no proper morals of her own, and seemingly cannot grasp morality at all beyond light = good and dark = bad.

Matt

Been replaying the entire Kingdom Hearts series at the behest of a friend who’s never played the series and I completely forgot how much of a sociopath Aqua comes off as

Matt

prostitutes are really just the jerking class

Matt

Just the fact that I’m using the word “Taliban”, a word I heard on the news every day as a kid, is itself proof that this was inevitable, staying would only delay it. Twenty goddamn years, Jesus Christ…

Matt

What, you thought the Taliban would’ve been nicer about it if Trump had been re-elected? Get real. “Victory” was never in the cards.