Notices by Matt (zeldatra), page 55

Matt

The official Mattimation policy since it started has been to keep political jabs centered on those in power (or in the case of My Little Brony, about to be in power - I thought Mitt Romney was gonna win the then-upcoming election, which forced me to cut a joke out at the last minute when he, you know, didn’t) so regardless of the effect Trump’s Presidency had on my personal values, a HRC presidency would have seen me make about infinity cartoons about her emails. I had one ready to go and never released it because she ended up, you know, not winning.

Matt

Donald Trump got elected when I was at a very particular age where I was very suggestible and prone to raging against the machine so I’m pretty sure if it had been Hillary I would’ve ended up becoming a Republican

Matt

just found out that "wanna be the harley quinn to my joker" is probably a threat, no wonder i keep getting stood up

Matt

Bugs Bunny has lived in a single-family home in Southern California with Daffy Duck for five years. Daffy does not pay any rent. They spend a lot of time together, more time than Bugs spends with his own girlfriend, who he clearly hates and has nothing in common with, to the point that they've not had sex even once. To top it all off, Bugs Bunny drives a Prius.

What I'm saying is Bugs and Daffy are gay lovers.

Matt

If you were wondering - Space Jam 2 is really charming for like an hour and then the basketball game starts and the whole thing loses steam.

Matt

it was an antifa false flag, we know this because we would've gone hard

Matt

pretty funny that the conspiracy theories behind the capitol riot are all stuff like "that wasn't real because if it was we would've blown the place up and killed everyone inside because we're crazy"

Matt

One might be inclined to believe I’m up late again, but actually, I have work in thirty minutes.

Matt

and with gas prices these days, write your own punchline!

Matt

not to brag or anything, but I only had to refuel my car once my entire vacation and I was driving on I-95 for most of it

Matt

this is him. you can kinda see how he might have maybe been based on George W. Bush but he was generic enough that it didn't really matter. http://rainbowdash.net/url/875957

Matt

sorry, Martinez, not Ramirez, but you get the idea

Matt

it wasn't meant to be a fictional black president who was kind of based on Obama, like what they did with most of their shows while Bush was in office (President Ramirez, a rather generic guy played by John D'Aquino). it was supposed to literally be Barack Hussein Obama, 44th President of the United States of America, and the guy looked nothing like him.

Matt

like it was, like, imagine if Chris Tucker was playing Barack Obama in a biopic about his life

Matt

now they're showing something i remember, but apparently these days this show is heavily edited to remove "offensive jokes" (jokes about gluten-free diets)

Matt

there's also this other show on Disney Channel about a bunch of kids who get babysat by/babysit a bunch of aliens and it doesn't have a laugh track and the camerawork is really bad and there's like Phantom Menace-quality CGI and i think they used like a fish eye lens or something because the camera is always in people's faces and they end up really distorted???? one of the aliens goes around just being a dick to people because that's what he thinks humans do which is, like, fair i guess

Matt

she also voted for Gary Johnson???????

Matt

raven is a top

Matt

raven's a single mom who lives with chelsea who is also a single mom and the apartment they live in is entirely too nice for a millennial in Chicago and one of Raven's kids inherited her ability to have visions but also Raven still has visions so there's like two visions an episode now and they hide the fact that they have visions from each other??

Matt

right now i'm watching what i initially thought was That's So Raven but is actually a spinoff called Raven's Home and I'm not sure who it's for because they stopped airing That's So Raven when I was ten and I don't think (normal) adults are turning on Disney Channel at one in the morning.

Matt

but also Spongebob is still airing and also now there's a spinoff about Patrick Star but Spongebob is still in it so it's not even actually a spinoff????

Matt

The Loud House, btw, that's where i heard the phrase, i guess it's like the new Spongebob or something cos it's got a million episodes

Matt

i'm laying in a hotel bed in richmond watching cable television for the first time in years and i'm genuinely getting whiplash from some of the things they have on kid's television these days. just heard the phrase "i need to take a dump" on nickelodeon

Matt

I should probably stop saying things like “I’m 23, it’s too late for a midlife crisis” before somebody has me sent to a psychiatric hospital

Matt

on the other other hand, the house has a proper yard and is not attached to the neighbor's house, which is not only a foreign concept in Virginia, but means that I could reasonably just sit on my deck and toke it up without anyone bothering me about it

Matt

going out to West Virginia next week to look at a house. on one hand, the house is pretty nice and dirt cheap because it's in West Virginia. On the other hand, today I walked into a store and bought low-THC weed over the counter with a credit card which i think is punishable by death over there.

Matt

I live in a town where, for legal reasons relating to some billionaire literally buying the rights to independence day, we celebrate the fourth of July on the fifth of July. It's pretty weird.